Mid-2014 Mid-Year Update

UPDATE 2014, MID-YEAR, AUGUST

--

Well, so what have I done this year in 2014, from January-on?

January to April - Enrolled in Lincoln University (Jefferson City, Missouri) in a Computer Information Systems Bachelor degree program, with a Minor in Geographical Information Systems.

Funding: Funded by a Grant from Missouri Vocational Rehabilitation (VR); one requirement being that I attend full-time.  Due to my Learning Disabilities, I found this to be problematic.  I suggested half-time, to which I was told that I could not receive the grant if I did so.

Decision:  Due to time-constraints--caused by the imminent starting of the Semester, I took the funding, along with a Stafford Loan for about $5K, for personal expenses and some computer items that were not covered by the VR Grant.  This took my student loan debt to $35K, where it will stay until paid; I am not getting anymore federal student loans, as I find, at least for me, they have been a waste of time.

I am Learning Disabled.  For VR to make me take full-time classes was an improper decision.  A request for reducing my load to half-time was denied.  I feel I have been discriminated against by this agency.  I will probably have to file a complaint, and take the agency to court, if an agency hearing cannot resolve this problem as I perceive it.

I bear no ill-will toward the agency, itself; it helps people most of the time.  It has helped me in the past, but personal circumstances and family issues intervened that I could not perceive, so I faltered when success should have been attainable.

I have called the agency and indicated that I am still interested in vocational training.  I have been informed by the head of the local office that it is felt that I have been helped as much as the agency can help me; I have suggested alternative training--stressing Registered Apprenticeships--but since there are none of interest in my area, this track has met with failure, at least for now.

I feel apprenticeships could be formed if enough people showed an interest, or at least, a few showed a great deal of interest.  They require a number of people who are qualified for the area of interest to be willing to participate and provide training.  The type of apprenticeship I am interested in is termed, according to the federal apprenticeship database, "Geographical Information Systems Technician. (GIS-Tech, for short.)

There are virtually none in the United States.  If they exist at all, they exist in Canada or Europe.  I am now beginning an exhaustive, individual state search for these types of Registered Apprenticeships.  I am hopeful, but exceedingly skeptical.  This is a fairly recent listing in the federal database.  I may have to start my own agency--to be able to receive grants-- that specialized in starting Registered Apprenticeships, especially in the GIS field.  This may not be as easy as I would like it or expect it to be.

I also view certain aspects of my attendance at Lincoln University to be fraught with difficulty.  Due to the necessity of full time attendance, I was forced to juggle classes when not one, but two classes were cancelled due to lack of participation.  These were GIS classes.

The only one left that was available was the senior-level class, which is usually taken as the last class in the series, outside of field-work projects.

I managed to convince the department head of the GIS block to allow me to attend, primarily due to my having had exposure to the software the class was going to be using, and a small amount of prior experience.  They took me at my word, and gave me a go.  I failed.

I will not ask to be placed in an advanced-level class again unless I am able to provide my own portfolio of the type of work required; I gave it my best shot, but was not able to keep up with the rest of the required classes with a full-time load.

To make up the differences required for full-time attendance, I added two music classes, Introduction to Music Theory, and Choir.  Choir was a performance class, of which two concerts were required attendance.

I did okay, as I'm musically-oriented, being able to play piano a little, some woodwinds (flute, clarinet, saxophone), and harmonica (I have my own set of performance-grade harps.)

Still, I can't really say much for the instruction.  Too many egos getting in the way of any really true success; and those egos were not completely my own, although I do account for throwing something in the mix.  The entire environment wasn't conducive to true success.

The choir director didn't have any humor in the classroom at all.  All seriousness and no humor; very much a disciplinarian.  Outside of the classroom, the professor was affable enough.  Still, I did not do well in this class because of the tightness of emotion and no humor.

I'm just not that serious a guy, and need a bit of levity to keep things from blowing up in my face.   I felt like I was imprisoned for that 40 minutes of choir class, when I should have felt like singing a musical or two.

Also, as a choir member, the only music we sang were Christian Spirituals; can you say, "boring?"  Absolutely no spirit in the place.

I attended the first of the required concerts, but was having so much trouble in classes toward the end of the semester, I did not attend the final concert as it would not have made any difference in my grades.  I was also quite sick of the entire experience, so I negated the performance in front of the graduating seniors.  I just couldn't face anyone with any more of my failures.

I wish I could say that this was different.  I get tired of academician egos, and I tire of my seeming inability to articulate--and get--what I deem appropriate to accommodate my personal Learning Disability needs, as well as provide for my own, inherent desired for academic fulfillment.

I am tired of state agencies not being able to help me.  I tire of my constant poverty that prevents me from getting better psychological assistance to help me overcome my learning and personal problems.

I am intelligent.  I am not stupid.  I am not necessarily "slow," but there are issues--primarily mathematics--which stifle me and compound my ability to do other things.  The math issues correspond to an equally difficult time with certain aspects  of critical thinking, which can only keep me back and not moving forward.

I see other people who don't have these difficulties, and want to emulate their experiences, at least as far as succeeding in college--and Life--are concerned; I do not wish to be a clone, however.

I am articulate.  I can express myself very well in words and language.  I do not do so well in Algebra or other higher mathematical disciplines, and although I have an intense interest in the Sciences, this lack of mathematical development will always keep me at arm's-reach of success in this area.

I have taught myself a modicum about computers, but I am limited to the hardware level--IE, putting things together, assembling things, etc.--when the money-making areas are primarily in software development; I understand programming concepts, but it has been a very long time--since the late 1980's--when I last did any real programming.

That, and the instructor I had at Lincoln University didn't really do a very good job of teaching; that's not just my sentiment, many others in the class expressed the same concerns.

University-level computer programming should have a lot of structure, and should follow the book that is provided, to-the-letter.  This leads to consistency and the development of good programming habits; the class I attended provided neither of these, as the professor utilized mere handouts taken from the $100.00 text book the class was forced to buy! (Thank goodness I got my money refunded via book-buy-back at the university bookstore!)

I'm sticking to local, "community" colleges where people respect adult students!

However, I don't believe I will receive this where I currently reside.

WORK

So what about jobs?  I'm working on obtaining one, and may have success, soon.  My goal is to keep my job for one year, something I have not succeeded at yet.  (My record is 7 months, done in my Senior year of high school back in 1984, at a small IGA grocery store in my hometown (long closed.)

This my update.  I will do another as I feel necessary.

--THF

MoBill Android App Review

This app has great graphics!  I really like the interface, choice of button shapes, colors, etc.  A lot of thought went into the designing of the GUI portion of the software. I give this part of the program Five Stars.

Another excellent feature of this app is that it has a real embedded help menu. Most apps with a help button simply link it to a function that opens a web browser, opening the developer's home page. It's nice to have an embedded help list, so I really like this feature. Five Stars.

Embedded Calculator Feature, Available As Stand-Alone Function or Available in Sub Menus: Five Stars! (I can't speak highly enough about this one. Some apps link to an on-device, secondary calculator, which is cumbersome in a financial app where numerical calculation is desired at the record-creation entry point. The addition of an embedded calculator like this one fills this gap beautifully!)

The last thing I will review is the way in which the developer has chosen to add additional functionality to the app: AdFree. This doesn't work for me in many ways, either from a practical viewpoint or a philosophical one.

The Practical: Having to register with an ad service provider for extra functions is cumbersome. Mosts developers simply don't require this. Also, this particular app has the ad glaring at you at the very top of the app when it launches, drawing your attention, nay, "sucking you into" the advertisement at warp speed!

Some of the ads displayed have button-like, shaped graphics which are easily confused with app function buttons. I found this de-enhancing to proper app navigation, making the app somewhat unintuitive to someone new to the app.

The Philosophical:  This is more of a pet peeve of mine than anything else. I simply do not like advertising in phone applications like this one.

This a budgeting app, designed to help one keep tabs on their expenses.  It's not a game or a social app where advertisements might be expected.

Also, and this is the most glaring flaw as I see it: To enable advanced features, one has to register with a third party ad-provider, AdFree.

I don't agree with this kind of application development. Android is rife with advertisers, and others, that want people to believe that profit can't be made without a glaring, flashing banner adorning the various pages of phone apps.

I also don't buy into the "App Subscription Model" for an application whose primary purpose should not require it. A registration fee for additional dev support and feature enabling is fine. This is how most devs float, and makes sense, practically and philosophically.

However, combining both with as heavy a dependency on an ad service like AdFree, does not.

App Ad Factors: One Star

Final Total: Four Stars

Summary and Suggestions:  Get rid of AdFree! Re-write the code to more uniform standards of marketing, such as the "free app with advertising and limited features/paid app with all features and no advertising" model.

Also, ditch the ad-subscription marketing model. It's outdated and annoying as hell! Most users aren't going to pay a yearly subscription unless you're a magazine publisher offering original content or some type of professional service.

Keep the excellent graphics! This dev has an obvious talent for GUI design that captures the user. It caused me to download it and give it a try, merely from looking at at the app icon in the Play Store.

Thank you for the opportunity to review this app. I appreciate and pay for excellent quality software. I believe that the suggestions made in my review can, and will, help this app to become a winner in the market.

Best of Success,
--Stephen

Response to DEVILS_ADVOCATE at New York Daily News Comments Section:

Heh!  Sometimes one needs a few "devils" to help keep one honest.  Thanks.  I appreciate the element.

I've read and re-read your reply, and you bring up some very salient points.

Perhaps I was a bit gruff.  It's just that I grow so tired of the "same ol' same ol'" when it comes to what I shall term "conservative religious ethics," which, by their implementation, tend to "hold back" people to the point of becoming stagnant.  Especially those that become so immersed in a religion that they are no longer capable of rational, coherent thought, and, in the worst cases, refuse to, or are no longer capable (the ultra-worst?) of "Thinking Critically."  (This means that we accept reality for what it is, don't make any bones about it, and deal with it intelligently and effectively.  That's my definition, at any rate.)

I grew up Episcopalian.  It was fun and interesting when I was young.  I stopped "going to church" when I started using the pew as a second bed.  Zzzzzzz.  Not really, but that was the effect.  My mind was starting to go numb from the constancy.  No change.  No Difference.  Nothing New Here.  Move Along.  Move Along.  Etc.

I stopped going when I turned sixteen or so.  Probably the result of all that hot tea in the undercroft (basement kitchen/after-church snack area), introduced to me by the genteel old ladies of the church.  Well, as much as a Northern-Lower Michigan grandmarm can possibly be "genteel."  I am definitely not from The Deep South.

Getting on with this:  I realize not everyone will agree with my view on this subject.  Also, I can not advise from a Master's Level, only from a layman's perspective.  So I shall endeavor to be a bit more selective and less cutting in my vocal patterns, and also try to be a bit more...Ahem!...Ed-U-Ma-Ca-Ted! ;-)

I don't hate religion.  I have engaged in a smattering of religious paths from time to time throughout my life.  Everything from the aforementioned Episcopal church of my formative years, to USA-bred-and-induced "born again" Christian fund(y)mentalism (I was a "holy terror" to my friends in those years, and I'm lucky I still have most of them after that debacle in my young-adulthood, primarily my late teens and early twenties!)

I've also appreciated and participated in various of the "neo pagan" revivalist religious faiths, especially modern Wicca/Witchcraft, which I still respect, greatly, although I am not active in any type of specific activities, anymore.  I've found my own path based on very personal, internally-modulated experiences.

Call them mentally-/emotionally-/dreamtime-/subconsciously-contructed-/non-physically-/ImmersiveRealityInformedByPureThought-based, call-it-what-you-will.  These experiences, coupled with an out-of-body motif of expanded consciousness that has to be experienced-to-be-understood (words can not convey the, Ahem!  "Inherent Meaning"), and I find most, if not all, religion, "merely folly" at this point.

I'm simply growing tired of everyone "being so concerned for the Afterlife," that they forget the Life In Front of Them!  Also, isn't this a major problem, everywhere, in every place on Earth?  People not really believing that the Now Is Where They Should Be Because They Are?  If we can't change the past, and the future isn't here yet, then what do we have?  Seriously!

Relative to the one issue you brought forth:  I have an issue with the aspect of "tolerating the intolerable," as it's a dichotomy for me.  I mean, yes, it exists.  Intolerance, that is.  To be "intolerant of intolerance," has the aspect of "shooting one's self in one's own foot," I suppose; ie, "Not Much Progress Can Be Made Here At All" type of thing.  I trust that's to what you're referring?

I mean, the aspect of, say, "trying to kill intolerance" is the same as "trying to hunt down Love."  The emotive states are inherent ones, and can't be "captured, destroyed, folded, spindled, or mutilated."  (Unlike the iconic "IBM Card" of computatational ages past.)

Well, I hope this is, at least, a better response.  I'm not a scholar, nor do I play one on TeeVee. ;-)  I wish to Love Everyone, althought this task is daunting, and I'm Still Learning.  However, on that case, are not we all?

Here's to Learning To Love Everyone.

Sincerely,
The One With A Condo On The Outskirts Of Purgatory,
--Firefishe

P.S.  Not All Intolerance Is Tolerable
P.P.S.  Not All Tolerance Is Tolerable
R.S.V.P.  Can You Tolerate It?! ;->

FLASH! UFO's Scared Off By Welsh Rarebit-On-The-Hoof! Nephilim Flee Planet In Fear! Film At Eleven!

Review - Netflix Watch Instantly Movies - "A UFO Conspiracy"

This documentary is part "UFO Phenomenon Recap" and "UFO's-as-demonology," the latter of which really takes away from the first 75% of the film, which was really quite good.

I've watched other such documentaries before, and I've found all of them interesting.  Who wouldn't, given the subject matter.  However, this one left me wanting at the end, and sorely disappointed.

Let's look at the film more closely.

The last hundred years or so of sighting information was presented accurately, and without any type of implications being imparted to the viewer--save for the obvious element of We On Planet Earth possibly having been visited by extra terrestrial beings at one time or another.  *That* is, of course, the entire point of this film's study.

Stated another way, the first three quarters of the documentary didn't dive off the deep end into scare tactics, essentially letting the viewer decide for themselves.

Things broke down at the 75% mark, however, with an almost immediate segue into the mentioning of Abrahamic viewpoints about "Satan", "demons", and "fallen angels"  Can anyone say "Nephilim"?  (I mean, what type of project would this be if it didn't delve into the "fallen angels mating with the 'daughters of men'" mythology?

Following the first mentioning of the creatures, the viewer is treated to a wonderful flash-frame-forward viewing of a series of demonic-like images, replete with the usual "Goat Horned 'Devil'" type of pctures.  Historically, images such as these took the place of the pre-medieval "Pagan Gods," such as Pan, Cernunnos, and the rest of the various Pantheons that existed before Christianity took hold of Europe in ages past, essentially being used by the early European Churches as "substitute imagery" for the "heathen folk" (read: Country Dwellers), who had very little influence upon the more powerful factions of the day.

The last 25% of the documentary is a cautionary tale, and we are "warned very sternly" by--get this!--A "Welsh Baptist" pastor from California!  What the heck?  A Californian, Baptist pastor of Welsh decent, complete with accent.  This guy took up TEN WHOLE MINUTES, and was the LAST PART OF THE MOVIE!

"Ouch!"  In a word.

So just what is this telling us?  That Baptists seem to know all there is to know about so-called demons, devils, and fallen angels and their semi-human offspring (from the 'courting' of early history's young ladies, so it would appear.)?

This reviewer thinks otherwise.

Summarizing, I found "A UFO Conspiracy" rather enjoyable for the first three quarters of the show, but ended up rolling my eyes at the end.  The addition of a "California-based 'Welsh' Baptist Preacher" ending the film just didn't cut the mustard with this reviewer.

There wasn't enough information presented before the segue into the last quarter of the movie; if more supportive information had been given to support the latter part of the film, I believe it would have made it more enjoyable, as well as supported the (assumed) opinions of the film's producers.  However, as it stands, it just didn't do that very well, as I see it.

The first 3/4 was informative and interesting.  The last 25% was somewhat less satisfying, meant more to provide a fear-response in the viewer, of the "believe in Christ or Go Straight To Hell" type of response.  At that point, I had, indeed, had enough.

I'm just glad that Welsh Baptist isn't served with Welsh Rarebit.  To me, the two would just clash too much! ;->

Be Well Everyone, and Thanks For Reading!  --Firefishe

Netflix Movie Review: Ghost From The Machine - Netflix

Being a ham radio operator, as well as a paranormal buff, I understand the concept.  The concept being that, electromagnetic imprints of long-term residents of certain places may remain after death, and, if you could energize the ionic space in question, well, perhaps something might just appear--and even, if one were not careful, they'd be a little naughty.

However, that's not what bothers me. It's not the concept, the technology, or the low-budget nature of the film, ergo, actors, props, devices, locations, and such.  All of the aforementioned were used, as I see it, with alacrity; I also thought the cinematography was excellent and highly believable for such a film.  I enjoyed the low-key nature of the environmental shots--the store, the neighborhood, inside the store, the school...  Ah!  The School!

Let's cut right to the chase.  This film had characters that were simply bullies, pure and simple!  The educational system of whatever town this was in had absolutely no tolerance for any type of 'going against the norm' relative to school attendance.  It was draconian, unsympathetic, and threatening; and not much else.

The Child Protective Services Man, and the woman teacher were--as all good movie stereotypical tropes from days of yore do tell us--black.  Black, and with an attitude, ten fathoms deep to their very core, with the "movie-typical, socialistic, fascistic personality tendencies."
The fact is, save for very few exceptions--if any...I can't think of any place on the silver screen where it wasn't--this type of character is always portrayed by a black person, or persons, and they all have "that liberal extremist, education-at-all-costs-or-death" type of attitude.

I actually just jumped to the end, right before the basement encounter with the "nasty couple."  It was true-to-form.  The young Guardian-Of-His-Brother pleading and begging with the "big, bad, CPS Agent," followed by the CPS Agent giving a short, sweet, catch-all  statement "all you had to do was get him to school on time."  As if that mere fact is the only important issue going on.

The grief wasn't even mentioned!

Gads, if the family death issues weren't enough!  Didn't these people have family or friends who were sympathetic enough to suggest grief counseling?  This reviewer has been through a nasty experience, myself, with a family death that had a similar alienation effect--although for different reasons.  Still, this film's "government teaching establishment characters" brought out an ire in me that few films have ever done.

Now don't get me wrong.  I absolutely L-O-V-E-D the science part of it.  That's what I think should've been focused upon more, and then the relationship issues.  Think along the lines of the movie "Solaris" and you'll get my meaning.

Now, I wouldn't have taken apart the fridge just to satisfy a hobby need.  However, these circumstances were a bit more, well, weird.  Grief does weird things to people at times, and this on-screen-fantasy might just be what could happen, given the proper instances.

So, in summary:

• The scientific paranormal premise was, to me, a sound plot device.  So were the people centered around the happenings the device was causing.  I felt there could've been a bit more interaction along these lines, as this is what the film was primarily about.

• The scenes were well done, overall, and I really felt like I was in the "relatively bucolic" neighborhoods portrayed.

• The biology teacher seemed like a Les Nessman of WKRP In Cincinatti fame type of character, but with a bit more self-aggrandized arrogance, and not the least bit funny.  (Okay, I'll give his description of his classroom One Star for Effort!)

• The black woman cast as the principal (I wasn't sure on this one) was so stereotypically "movie trope," I was overjoyed that the one scene she was in didn't last long.  The close-up really got to me; I felt it was *that* horrible, utterly predictable, and trite.  (Which leads me to question:  Did the director have an issue with Minnesota's Child Protective Services, of which I've heard some horror stories?  "Socialist Fascistic" type of stuff?  Read:  "Nazi In A Mortarboard!")

• The real banger for me was the character of the Child Protective Services Agent.  I don't think this actor had much to do, other than act mean, be threatening, and pander to verbiage equaling nothing more than ultimatums, as if "someone as young as the surviving eldest son" couldn't figure it out, eventually, with a bit of sympathetic counseling.  (Empathic wouldn't hurt, either!)  My interior loathing was really drawn out by this character, and it was not a pleasant experience.

So the movie ends with the older son's younger brother being ignominiously driven away by an unsympathetic authority figure--who didn't even have a part in understanding the other part of the film--which, to me, is what the tale was really about.

I found the 'custody/threat' sub-plot non-engaging and detrimental, drawing the viewer away from the technical/spiritual elements of the main plot device, and ending the movie with a non-plussing sort of feeling

Still, I enjoyed most of it.  I give it a Net Total of Three Stars.

-THF

Withdrawn From Kaplan

Summary Update

1. Kaplan University = $33K for an Associate's, 66K for a Bachelor's.
2. Loan debt of $31K+ already incurred, ergo, NO MORE LOANS!
3. Working on a smaller Missouri Technical College where I can use ONLY GRANT MONEY!
4. Above being held up due to Financial Aid Verification issues related to taxes.
5. Waiting on 2011 W2 from USA Truck so I can file my 2011 return.
6. Wishing I Had Money!
7. Wishing I Had Talent To Earn Money
8. Tired Of Being Held Back By Every Circumstance.
9. Wanting Relief From Disabilities.
10. Desiring New Path and Experiences To Get Me To Where I Want To Be.

 --THF

Kaplan University

Hello Everyone, The Humble Fishe here, back from another long hiatus.

Summer's come and gone, and a lot has happened in the world.  In my corner of our planet, I've had a nice Holiday season and New Year.  So, with a new season of life upon me, I figured it was time to continue my educational pursuits.

You see, I made a promise to myself a few years ago wherein I promised myself that I would earn a college degree by the time I'm 50!  That promise remains, as yet, unfulfilled.  So I'm trying again.

I've chosen  Kaplan University's Online Information Technology Associate Degree program (to start), and their Bachelor Degree program to round out my first--and probably last--college educational endeavor.  I may or not need to get a Master's, but Graduate degrees are another matter, have different dynamics than the undergraduate programs, and have their own inherent nuances, challenges, and politics.

Better to leave the Graduate degrees alone for the time being and concentrate on the more immediate need of obtaining my Associate Degree.   And what an Associate Degree it is!  At $33K, it's quite the two-year.  The thing is, I  haven't found any way to be reasonably successful with local colleges, and I'm online all the time, anyway, so I figured that "it's time to just go private!"

Private schools are more expensive than their public counterparts, but they also often provide more personalized service than their public counterparts.  Online education is different from in-person education.  I believe that online teaching should take advantage of the medium, and not try to be a "mere copy" of an in-person classroom experience.  If I wanted that, I have a plethora of local choices from which to choose.

Well, I choose Online, instead!

I'm more comfortable in the privacy of my own home, where I can concentrate.  Since I have ADHD and other "cognitive learning disabilities" to begin with, this makes more sense from a "quiet and central place to work and plan" point of view.

It does present the challenge of all the adherence to the attendance of live, online seminars (of which many of Kaplan's online courses are made up of), and navigating the online environment's homework portals, library, and other such matters, but to a person who's used to working with Arch Linux, I don't see this as being much of a problem, let alone, a challenge.

Point-and-click to the correct item on the web page, hit the Submit button, and you're there!  Homework 101's done for the week!  (At least, that's the simplified version ;->.  There are almost always exceptions.  Still, I deal with these things pretty decently for most, if not all, items.)

I'm still in the preliminary stages of the application process, and won't know more until tomorrow, Friday.  I need to get through the Financial Aid process, and this will either make or break my ability to participate at Kaplan.  I can be only hopeful that a positive attitude will get me through the process, and onto the more important elements of class participation.

I look forward to keeping everyone updated.  I shall add more as time progresses.

Best Regards,
The Humble Fishe

Buggies, Buggies, Everywhere!!!

There is a name for a boxspring when it is infested with cockroaches and other insects:  G-A-R-B-A-G-E!

Alas, that is what I had to do to our current boxspring--a piece of furniture that has been broken for over a year now and needed replacing aeons ago:  THROW IT OUT!

AND I DID!

Into the dumpster it went, and now resides, awaiting the morning trash truck to come and take it away, and crush it's little buggy innards out of existence!

The wife and I are now, by proxy, going to need a new bed.

I'm sticking to my guns on this one and buying quality!  Queen minimum, wood frame, with heavy duty wood slats.  My wife and I are not small people, and we both add a bit of...errr...'gravity' that necessitates a firm foundation, with a boxspring and mattress that won't fall apart!

The first bed was free, kindly given to us by Very Very Good Friends' parents when we first moved into our apartment.  We were extremely grateful to get that frame, boxspring, and mattress when we did, but it has worn out, and the time has come to purchase a new sleeping system.

ONE MAIN PROBLEM:  BUGS!

The entire apartment is a breeding ground for cockroaches and water bugs--at least, that's what they look like to me.  They're a little black, pear-shaped insect with a red mark on it's back.  (And no, folks!  It's *not* a black widow spider. Spiders are larger and have eight legs, not six! ;-)  Just thought I'd mention that!

And right now, I'm Tired, Buggy, and just washed my face, shaved, and am sipping on a nice 'Mountain Holler,' Save-A-Lot's version of Mountain Dew.  It's not bad at all!  It's not Cherry Coke, but it's still not bad! :-) 

I'm happy this is done for a while.  I need to complete this over the weekend, but for now, I'm taking a break!

I'll be back later with more stories from Bugville!

Warm (and Buggy) Regards,
--Stephen 

Geocache: Deciding Against

This one started out as a late-evening cache hike, but turned into a bit of an adventure for the Firefishe.

My tagline reads Caching in On The Journey, and boy did the Journey kick my butt!

I got to the historical marker in about twenty minutes, and, thankfully, the sun was still up.  I had a backpack on with two LED 2-D-Cell Maglight flashlights with freshly charged batteries, drinks, and money, of course, so I was prepared in advance.

My Garmin Dakota 20 is always loaded with the latest updated caches, ala GSAK's GC.com API interface, so I'm always up to date.  I also recently updated my free maps from garmin.openstreetmap.nl, as well as the usual 24K topo maps from the gpsfiledepot.com.

(Author's Note:  If no one has heard, there are a ton of free, highly detailed and up-to-date maps available for the Garmin Colorado, Oregon, and Dakota series of GPS receivers.  All legal.  All Free!  All from public-domain information!  I'm waiting to buy an Oregon, so I can use 3D maps, a bigger display, geotagging camera and voice recorder, but for $230 plus a Garmin Chirp geocache beacon, the Dakota 20 package I bought worked out beautifully for my budget, and still gave me a great system!  I'm loving it!)

Back to the hike.

I solved the puzzle easily enough, and was going to just walk the streets to where I needed to be ( had been there before, but didn't log my first DNF earlier this summer when I tried this the first time.)when I came across something I had never seen before:  A New Bike/Walking Path!  Apparently, this is part of the Jefferson City Greenway, which is a paved biking and walking trail within the general city limits of Jefferson City.

I recalled that I was out on an adventure that evening, so I didn't hesitate when I was across from the Jefferson City High School and the new (to me) bike trail just seemed to beckon me to 'take a chance.'  Well, that 'chance' led me up and down so many hills, that my legs were like toast at the end of the evening.  The hike took me, ultimately, to the bottom of a hill where lay a little community park I never knew existed.  Aurora Community Park or something like that.

Since the new trail ended there, I had no choice but to go up the street--anything to break the monotony of the trail--and follow it a bit, but where I ended up was news to me!  I ended up in a part of town I'd driven in a few times, but never thought I'd ever end up hiking in, it's just not 'that kind of neighborhood, if you know what I mean.  Not really dangerous, mind you, just more given over to vehicle traffic than foot traffic.  The sides of the roads don't always have sidewalks, and one has to step over to the curb to let cars by now and again.  Not really pedestrian friendly, but what can you do?

I was glad to see the Jefferson Street Break Time convenience store, and bought a huge Landshire microwave-ready burger, the big one that's nearly six inches in diameter!  That burger and a one-liter lemonade hit the spot!  I was ready to go again after about a half-hour rest period, most of it spent sitting outside on the curb near the car wash in the rear of the building.  It was good to see lots of people after almost two hours of trekking in unfamiliar streets!

Well, to wrap it up, I made my way via more familiar streets, to the part of the Greenway trail I knew went directly to the cache area from the opposite end of where one usually parks to get to this cache.  Good thing, too, as there was a car that seemed to be going back and forth along the street next to the sidewalk I was on; when he went out of sight, I did a quick jog to the Greenway trail, went down a hill, and was glad when I was below eye-level view.

So I make my way to where the cache is supposed to be, and my GPS takes me up a slope (I won't say which one, and there are many!) to within 3 feet of Ground Zero, but alas, no cache!  Not even in mega-bright-white LED lighting from my mag light.  So, and because I had forgotten my red lenses for the lights, I decided to wait until a daylight excursion can be made, preferably on a Sunday afternoon when things are quiet and not many people are about.  I do try to protect the integrity of the caches I hunt, and have been doing so since 2002! :-)

Well, that's it!  I'm writing this on 20 OCT 2012 on an early Saturday morning.  I'm hoping to get out later today, weather permitting--and in possession of the family car--and get this one logged!  My 46-year-old body is not as peppy as I'd like, and regular visits to my gym are in order, so I can do more like this, but man!  What a rush!  I felt better, albeit achey, after three-and-a-half hours of pure exercise I haven't done in months!  I Love Geocaching!

Thanks for a Grand Adventure R-L-P!  I'll be back to log this one soon!

Warm Regards From,

Firefishe
Caching In On The Journey

Just a quick note to say that things seem to be getting better.

Last week's entries were a bit on the down side, and since this my personal blog, needed to be placed where I could get things down and work them out, through writing, which is largely what this blog is about.

This blog is not about numbers, how much money I can make, or how popular I can make myself.  It is--so far as it goes--my place to be, and,  when necessary, honest with myself and anyone else who cares to read it.  Even brutally honest when I am in need of it.

I may delete things I don't like, I may keep them 'forever' (so far as Blogger let's them stay up, of course), but so far as blogs go, this is my own personal opinion space, my place to let out my fears, frustrations, and angst.

It is also a place for me to foment positive and growth-inducing commentary, on my life, or any other aspect of life in which I may have an interest.  There are other blogs for other things, like making money and building popularity.  This is not that blog.

This is the blog of The Humble Fishe, where I 'gently suggest' pathways that can enhance my growth, as well as communicate to others, as the need arises.

That said, I still wish well all who read this, and choose to share in my life's journey through space and time.  On Earth.  And Beyond.

Blessings and Light To All
Love and Light
--The Humble Fishe

A Haiku Self Perspective

How can I be me

When every time I move out

The past holds me back

--

How can I be me

When every time I walk tall

The past drives me down

--

How can I be me

When every time I sing loud

The past says "Quiet"

--

How can I be me

When every time I see light

I hide in the dark

--

Why does a small voice

Keep saying to me, daily

You're not worthy, stop

--

Is that really me?

A star, shining in the dark?

Being seen by none?


If this is the way I've been living for the last 40 years, how am I ever to really understand the remaining time between now, and the time of my passing?

What will I have done?  Self-denial of ability, putting up with mediocrity in everyone who is supposed to be helping me thrive, and not lifting a finger of my own body to do anything about it, because "I Feel Tired?"

Truth is, I'm tired all the time.  I have seemingly lost the will to dream, let alone create.  And that is the crux of the entire matter:  Creation.

I've accepted a lot from others, tried to learn from within my society's version of education, and have fallen flat on my face in failure, each and every time.  No advancement.  No learning.  No completion.

And that incompleteness has forced me to pay a price.  Socially, anyway.  And I am devastated in this, in that I am not able to participate in thriving friendships with people who have spirit, people who have energy, and people who share the same compassion I have in my heart.

Instead, I am only able to form superficial relationships outside of my own family.  I have a loving companion, and she is the dearest one akin to perfection I have ever met.

Myself, however, I do not hold in such high regard.  I feel lousy on a daily basis.  Lousy because I have not advanced one iota, save for minescule baby steps that make a Model T look like a dragster.

My heart is seemingly closed, and doesn't want to yield up it's secrets to me.  All I hear about is why people are inherently guilty, for even being born.  My mind rails against this blasphemy of the Human Spirit, and I feel empowered those times, but only for short periods, the energy required to maintain the feelings of empowerment being overwhelming to my senses, and so, eventually, it ebbs.

I have so much to offer, I feel, if I could only find a gateway, a portal, and the latch and valve that would allow the bursting forth of creative urge and means to achieve that end, in whatever chosen goal.

Right now, though, I am stagnant.  I have little reserve and sleep most of the day, and night.  I am quiet, like the little words inside my head want me to be.  All they say is "sleep".

Well, I am tired, but not of wanting to begin to create.  I am tired of sleeping, and desire, truthfully, to fully Wake Up and Be!

When will that happen?  When I Am Awake.  Fully!

--The Humble Fishe

Ten (10) Things I Want In Work:

1) I want to have freedom and make money at the same time.

2) I want to have work that helps me define my life-purpose, as well as satisfy my technical interests.

3) I want to have meaningful interaction with people in a like-minded profession, in work that helps others.

4) I want soulful activity that brings me closer to others, and helps me understand them better.

5) I want the work I do to have meaning, actively helping others better understand the world environment.

6) I want to define how I work to the point where I don't lose meaning, yet can help others find the same.

7) I don't want to be a number.

8) I don't want the work I do to cause others to become numbers.

9) I want the profession in which I work to build bridges between differences, and help stabilize chaos (a bit).

10) I wish to do no harm, where at all possible. Defense is allowable, but not overall, unmitigated conflict.

I hope this helps to clarify my position on what kind of work I am seeking. Peace! --Stephen

HumFisheKu Special -- F U C K I N G | F R E A K Y | F R I D A Y S!

HARROWING MEALS

MICKEY DEE'S GAUNTLET FROM HELL

MORONS' PASSION PLAY!

Sometimes You Just Can't Win - The Friday That Bit Back!

So my wife's alarm on her phone rings...followed by mine, five minutes later.  Then the "fun" begins...

She gives me a Twenty, and I go up to McDonald's to get our dinner, before she goes to work.  Mind you, it's 4:35, and this trip, along with a visit to the credit union to get some laundry change, should only take fifteen minutes at the outset, twenty minutes, tops!

Alas, the firm of Bullshit, Fizzle, and Muckracker intervened so turn my 20 minute junket into 35 minutes.  Here's how it went down:

I drive up to the highway on-ramp, get on the highway without any problems.  I notice that, in the other lane, an old pickup truck is off the road a bit, on a berm of lawn that pretends to be a shoulder, with someone walking around.  I'm guessing "accident", but don't pay it any mind until later.

So I get off on the next exit, and make it to Mickey Dee's.  Lo and Behold!  There is no traffic in the outer drive-thru lane, and only one at the inner station.  So I place my order, pay my money, drive up to the take-out window and. . .  FIND OUT THEY'VE GOTTEN MY ORDER WRONG FOR THE THIRD TIME THIS MONTH, AND WITHIN A WEEK AND A HALF PERIOD!  (Link To HumFisheKu Special:  F U C K I N G | F R E A K Y | F R I D A Y S!).

So I have to park the car, go inside, and explain "what's wrong" to the management.  The second time this happened, the manager gave me a free meal for my trouble.  I received a complimentary Free Extra Value Meal Card, which I gave promptly to my wife when I got back...and that's another story.

Before I went home, I needed change for the laundry, so I went to our credit union across the street.  This particular financial institution, instead of just taking the $10 I gave them, and giving me back the $5 in Quarters and a $5 Dollar Bill--like any other place--has to go through the entire account lookup and verification procedure, "just because I have an account" with them.  Stupid!

So I finally get my cash, and have to go back to Mickey Dee's because I notice one of my drinks is missing.  So I go back, get that, and head out.  Remember the "accident" that I postulated about before?  Well, Lo and Behold!  THE POLICE HAVE THE ON-RAMP BLOCKED!  So I have to take the long way around, go down a huge hill, hit another traffic light, turn left, go up another large hill, and then on the way down...my car engine conks out as I'm braking!

So I pop it into Neutral, and re-start the beast without a problem, veer right on my home street, go up a small hill, then down a slight decline and run into...A MOTORCYCLE COP THAT HAS TWO PEOPLE PULLED OVER FOR SOMETHING OR OTHER--PROBABLY ANOTHER...Oh, let's just call it an "incident" this time, as it didn't appear that anyone was injured or there was anything more than superficial vehicular body damage, from what I could see.

Anyway, I have to wait for two vehicles to weave their way around the police bike--flashing lights and all (Nice Harley! :-]), and watching the Officer, and the other two drivers, etc.  So I get through that, drive up the last remaining hill, make a Good Left Turn (on a dime!) and finally am able to park in my assigned and numbered spot, which is in front of the apartment I call home.

During all the time I was rushing, my wife had been trying to phone me, and I ended up finding my E71 Nokia to be in Meeting Mode, which beeps and vibrates only once.  So I get chewed out for that, but I took it in good stead, as she didn't know what was going on in the car.  (My forgetfulness notwithstanding; I SHOULD HAVE REMEMBERED TO SWITCH IT BACK TO *L-O-U-D*!)


It is my fondest hope that this post provides a satisfactory explanation to my wonderfully patient wife.

To My Honey:  I'M SORRY SWEETHEART! *SMOOCHLES*

TO THE ASSHOLE OUTSIDE INFLUENCES:  "EAT MY SHORTS, FUCK OFF, AND DIE!"

'K'  'Nuff Said!

--The Humble Fishe

HumFisheKu For August 2012

Soulful worker wants

Gainful employment today

Everyday funding

A Post on Jobs and Credit History

I have been out of work for a very long time now.  I am learning disabled and have issues with certain types of positions, especially high-volume, production jobs; since I've tried this and failed, I no longer look for this kind of work.

So what does The Humble Fishe want?  Well, financial independence, for one, but that comes from building up a compound of money and ideas over time, then implementing the ideas when the money and ideas come together, synergistically, at the proper time.

So, what kind of job to get to work up to that synergistic, jumping-off point?  Hmmm.  How about driving a bread truck for a local bakery company?  Sounds reasonable, eh?  The Humble Fishe holds a Class "A" Commercial Driver's License, has no moving violations, and no criminal history to speak of.  Still sound okay?

So I call up the number, and get routed to...A Temporary Agency!  Temporary Agencies--most well known as "Temp Services"--frustrate me to no end.  One issue is how they list their job postings.  Some are so encapsulated by generic language, it's almost impossible to find out just who the company is who posted the availability of the job through the agency in the first place.  Additionally frustrating is the lack of direct contact with the company.

Generally, I do not actively seek employment through temp services.  I've had to deal with social pariahs and I'm tired of trying to be, *GULP!*, "sociable".  "Sociable" here means being able to actively converse on mundane topics of general and local interest that have absolutely nothing to do with the jobs-at-hand, or at-large.  I'm not a gossip columnist, and could care less what everyone else's children are doing on their soccer leagues, football games, who's talking about whom or what, ad infinitum, ad nauseum.

I go in to a temp service office, dressed appropriately, and ready to work.  Or, at least, that's the idea.  As I stated earlier, my luck with these agencies has been dismal, at best.  So, what does that have to do with driving a bread truck?

Here's the pitch:  I decided to do some job searching today.  I looked on my local state employment agency's job website (all states have these), and found a possibility.  Bread delivery for a commercial bakery service.  So I called the number listed to check into it.  Everything was going fine, until I was told I "had to have a credit rating of 525" (or similar) to be considered for the job.

I WAS LIVID!  I DON'T GIVE PERMISSION FOR ANYONE TO USE ANY TYPE OF "CREDIT SCORE" FOR THE PURPOSE OF EMPLOYMENT, AND NEITHER SHOULD ANYONE ELSE!

Let me explain my point:  "Credit Scores" are mathematical numericals that are used by private companies (Trans Union, Equifax, etc.) that some people sometimes use to consider when people apply for bank loans and other such financial products.  So how does that apply here:

EMPLOYMENT ABILITY HAS ABSOLUTELY NOTHING TO DO WITH CREDIT SCORES!  BEING ABLE TO DO A JOB HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH CREDIT SCORES!

The only reason this temp agency wanted the score was because the bakery company expects a driver to "buy their route" after a time, and wanted that minimum score; this has absolutely no bearing on whether or not I'd be able to:  Take Orders, Give Product Knowledge, Learn A Delivery Route, Drive A Delivery Truck or Van, Load and Unload A Delivery Truck or Van, Use Suggestive Sales Techniques to Add To Present Sales, etc.

Sounds like a franchise offering masquerading as generic employment to me!  I don't agree with this type of thing.  "It's Sales!"  Pure and Simple!!!  Ergo:  IT SHOULD BE LISTED AS A FRANCHISE OFFER.  IF I "HAVE TO BUY THE ROUTE", IT'S SALES!  NOT GENERAL EMPLOYMENT!

I also looked at some reviews on indeed.com and apparently this company has a lot of unsold routes and is not a very good place to work, either.  Long hours on the road, no home time, etc.  I would've had this if I had become an over-the-road trucker, driving big rigs--another career I wasted five years of my life proving it was what I didn't want! That lesson cost me too much, and I'm still in debt over the last endeavor.  Ergo: NO MORE OVER-THE-ROAD TRUCKING FOR THE HUMBLE FISHE!

I just want decent, local employment; later on, a legitimate business opportunity that won't set me back much to start.  Either way, I'll need money first to start any type of business enterprise, regardless of the type.

Now, I probably shouldn't have gotten so upset, now that I've looked at some reviews of that bakery.    It's just that I get so frustrated, at times.  And considering I'm "pushing fifty", it'd be nice to have a profession, at least by that time.

I've been out of the "job searching game" for a long time now.  I don't like looking randomly for work.  I prefer referrals.  As it stands, I may have a short-term position available to me, thanks to a local acquaintance. However, that's still up in the air.

I'll post more as more information becomes available.  I don't hold my breath for jobs, anymore.  I've been disappointed too often, and burned too much to pay much heed to hype.  I take my time, look closely, consider carefully, and apply when I feel I have a decent chance of succeeding.

Best To All,

The Humble Fishe

HumFisheKu For July 2012

A brave step ahead

Wheels once silent revolve

Slowly grind forward